Ariftarchus, Lucretius, and Cornelius Gallus, and in the last age the celebrated Spiera. In fhort, fo natural is an impetuofity on this head to noble minds, that without giving ourselves the trouble of fearch

ing

which he chofe to be put to death. He therefore begged of the king that he would caufe a funeralpile to be erected for him, and fet on fire when he was upon it. Alexander would fain have diffuaded him from it, but finding him refolute, he determined to honour his death with all the grandeur of funeral rites, out of the regard which he had for this philofopher (whom he ought rather to have looked upon as foolish): he therefore ordered all his army to be ranked up in battle array, and all the richest kinds of perfumes to be ftrewed upon the pile, to which the philofopher, dreffed in the moft fuperb habit, commanded himself to be brought. He then lay down on it, and when the fire began to touch him he still continued in the fame pofture, without fhewing the leaft marks of pain. It is added, that when he was afked if he had any thing to fay to Alexander, who did not chufe to be prefent at the facrifice, he replied, No; that he had nothing to fay to him then, as he hoped to fee him foon again at Babylon: words, which were afterwards regarded as a prediction of that hero's death, who really died three years afterwards in that city.

A philofopher of the Academic fect, who, after reading Plato on the immortality of the foul, threw himself into the fea.

ing backwards into the annals of scientific, or heroic hiftory, we need go no farther than to the many examples we daily fee of it amongst the inhabitants of our own nation; a nation which efteems itself, and is esteemed by others, the wifeft, braveft, and most philofophical of all nations in the world, who cut their throats, blow out their brains, hang themfelves, or plunge into a river, or a fish-pond, and all this in cool blood, with all the calm deliberation poffible; nay, fometimes in wanton fport. And whence can this proceed? Why, from a lively ardour, a violent paffion they poffefs of going quickly into Hell, whither they think they cannot arrive foon enough, even with all the hafte that they can make, or the pains they can bestow.

THE women even have not failed in fhewing this defire, not willing to yield to men in this point more than in any other. For instance, the lovely Dido, the unhappy Jocafta, the chafte Lucretia, the fair and gallant Cleopatra, the faithful and tender Portia, the charming and heroic Arria, and feveral others. Witnefs alfo the practice of most of the women in India,. who, when their husbands die, caft themselves alive upon the fame pile, not wanting to furvive them, and are confumed; thus hafting to rejoin them in the infernal regions, where they doubtless poffefs the most diftinguished apartments, which their furprizing faith

fulnefs has deferved fo well.

CHAP.

**

CHAP. VI

By whom the apartments of the first rank in Hell are

NOTW

occupied.

OTWITHSTANDING what we mentioned at the close of the laft chapter, with respect to the first apartments in thefe regions being appointed to the ladies, we are affured, from very good hands, that this honourable distinction is difputed with them by a fet of men, who are always abfolutely determin-, ed to rule the roaft in every place they come to, and keep the upper hand of whatever compány they meet with in it : for which reafon, that we may not excite the indignation of these gentlemen against us in this place, we shall not hesitate a moment to give them the preference, leaving to the ladies themfelves the care of maintaining their own right of precedence. These honourable and overbearing perfonages are no other than our refpectable prelates and churchmen. People who have ever been accuftomed to affume and maintain the first places in this world; Why then should they not be allowed the fame privileges in Hell? Would it not be the highest injuftice to refufe it to them, when we reflect but ever fo little upon their conduct in this world ?;

The Monks.

IN

In short, what do they not contrive, what do they not attempt, what do they not execute, that can entitle them to this great reward! Do not fome of them feem to have taken on themselves the talk of overturning all the great fabrics of religion and morality, in those large volumes which they employ their lives in the compofing! And for what purpose ? Undoubtedly, in hopes to acquire the moft diftinguished places in the infernal realms. Do not others, whom their am. bition, their factions, their cabals, their political principles, and fometimes even the very worst of crimes, have placed near to the ears and hearts of kings and princes, or of their children, under the specious notion of giving the latter inftruction, and training up their minds to virtue, or of aiding the former with their falutary counfels: do they not, I fay, instead of this, drag them to Hell with them, by teaching them to falfify their promifes; to opprefs their subjects; to violate and break through, the most folemn treaties ; to ftir up needlefs wars, and perfecute religion in those who profefs it in all its purity? And what is all this for only to have the honour of their company, and be the means of keeping close to them, to gain and preferve the most respected rank in Hell. True Proteuses on earth, you fee them taking every fort of shape and acting every kind of character that may promote their interefts. In armies, they are foldiers; in trading cities, merchants; ftudents in colleges and in academies; gentlemen at court, and peasants in the country; they even become women to men, as they

are:

are truly men to women. In short, they stick at nothing to make them worthy of being received with honour at the court of Lucifer.

WHILST they take thefe fteps, and undergo thefe labours, to qualify themselves for a just claim to the infernal precedence, their novices in their cloisters take infinitely more for the fame purpose during their noviciate for this, fome tear their flesh to pieces with terrible lafhes of their difciplines: fome bind themfelves with ropes, like mules or affes; this wraps himself in haircloth, whilst that goes always barefoot; one lies on the hard ground; another abftains from food: others again fatigue themfelves by vigils, as extraordinary as they are fuperfluous, by long and tedious fafts, by genuflexions numberlefs; by long and tirefome prayers, which they are continually muttering day and night another kind abstain from female intercourfe; or, if at least, they do at any time indulge the gentler paffions, it is by ftealth, and with the utmost fecrefy, not to difhonour their order. Now, pray, tell me, what can their defign in all this be? To purchase Hell; yes, I fay, to purchafe Hell; for, as none of these things are neceffary, or have been commanded by religion to obtain Heaven, it is therefore evident it must by the contrary motive, by which they are induced to undertake, and to endure thefe miferies, with a degree of courage which borders very clofe on heroifm.

AND